August 2007

The battle with procrastination

By Words of Colour intern Marsha Blake

I have a confession to make. I’m a serial procrastinator. Well, they say that admitting to a problem is the first step to overcoming it. Yet somehow I get the feeling that it’s not that simple when it comes to dealing with procrastination...

I’ve always been of the mindset that procrastination is a negative thing - the ‘posh’ word for damn lazy. And maybe it is. Or maybe it’s a bit deeper than that. Some of the busiest and most over-worked people I know are first-class procrastinators. They’ll do absolutely every task under the sun, but avoid doing that one crucial thing that actually really needs their attention.

Take me for example. My diary is packed to bursting point with events, meetings, interviews, etc... Somehow, despite the frenzy of it all, I find the time to fit everything and everyone into my schedule. But my Words of Colour deadline for this opinion piece I’ve put off and side-stepped with every possible excuse imaginable. "I can’t think of anything to write about", "I’m just not in that ‘place’ to write right now", "I’ve got others priorities", you get the picture.

It seems as soon as the pressure is on to meet a deadline, the dreaded writer’s block descends upon me like a black cloak of nothingness. It’s purpose? To fill me with doubt, dread and the inability to string a sentence, let alone a whole 500-words, together. Thus the procrastination sets in like gangrene.

Wearing my life coach/counsellor hat, it’s sometimes like looking in a mirror when I’m faced with people like myself who find themselves unable to just get on and do it - whatever ‘it’ is, for whatever reason. With these people, I empathise, offering encouragement and support to help them get past their internal blocks. I then sit back and wonder in bewilderment at why I’m unable to motivate myself in the same way that I motivate others.

As a writer, I’ve found that my biggest battle has not been with commissioning editors, but with Marsha! As much as I love to write, my desire to exceed myself can sometimes inhibit and overwhelm me, which then leads to evasive urge. But for those of you who can relate to my tale of woe, you know from experience that procrastinating not an easy option. It usually leaves you feeling at odds with yourself because you know you can and should do better.

As for me, I’ve decided that attack is the best form of defence against my procrastinating tendencies. No sense in fighting it with morale-destroying and self critical berating. Instead, I defiantly brandish my pen and pummel my inner procrastinator into submission each time it rears its ugly head.

I know I am victorious once again when I look at the once blank page and marvel "wow - where did that come from?"

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